12 Years of Adventures

12 years of Adventures.

I started this blog shortly before Greta was born, for fun and comedy when I was losing my mind at the thought of becoming a mother - it was a level of "scary" I wasn't sure I could handle.  The world, in hindsight, wasn't in as a horrific state in 2010 as it is now, some of the dreams and hopes I had for Greta before she was born did become reality, but who would have imagined the world we have raised children in over the past 12 years.  Two and a half years of a global pandemic, millions dead despite advancements in science and medicine; a world where more and more young people are entitled brats - yup, I said it, and I dare say most would agree; technology has replaced face to face interactions and communication; everyone is busy and kindness is rare and frustrations high.  It is definitely not the world I hoped to raise a child in, but we shelter where we can and make the best of what hands we are dealt.  I don't know the solution to making the world better, but I can do my best to ensure our girl is prepared to deal with the good times and bad and hopefully be the kind and good that the world desperately needs.  

We will be doing a birthday re-do since my ill health has put a damper on her "real birthday", I am sad for her and for myself, more because I really never wanted her to have a memory of being disappointed on a special day - and as I found myself in the hospital battling with a failing liver and complications - I sadly was the culprit.  And while the world is busy, and acquaintances are busy, I am sad that we didn't have help to brighten her day and make it a bit more special.  Darren did his best to start her day off with some gifts, a drive to school, and Nana arrived and we had take out delivered.  But not the birthday I wished for her and I could see the disappointment in her eyes.

And since we are on a re-do (delayed bday), my year 12 letter to Miss Greta Claire is below, and since I recalled the password, I could actually add a blog post!

The fact that we have a 12 year old is almost hard to comprehend - but without a doubt, it has been the most amazing 12 years we never knew we needed.  My thoughts of what parenthood would be like far exceeded my expectations.  I can't deny I often recall my mother saying "Someday, I hope you have a kid just like you!" - For the record, this was not a compliment and I thank goodness Greta is nothing like me as a child as I was a sassy brat who hated the world!  I am the reason I hate kids, well, that and a teaching practicum :)  Thankfully with the exception of a few sighs and eye rolls, and vocal hatred for blood, dentists, and nurses with needles - we have had the pleasure of growing alongside an amazing girl who has yet to give us a moment of grief - worry yes - but I can't believe how lucky we have been raising such a sweet girl.  Perhaps we will see the attitude that so many of my friends share happen in their homes, but knock on wood - it hasn't hit yet!  Lucky for us, she didn't get my fiery temper, door slamming habit, medical genes, and my well-known inability to forgive and forget. She has the best qualities of us both, yet an added bonus of being confident, socially aware, fun, naive yet mature.  This girl is destined to make a difference and we can't wait to see where she will be in another 12 years.  

Greta,

Your gifts are plenty: talented, smart, artistic, musical, but it is your kind personality and your empathy for those around you that has us beaming with pride.  

May you always see the beauty in others and yourself - be confident in who you are and be proud.  Healthy comes in all sizes, shapes, colours - don't ever feel the need to compare yourself to others, know that your worth is not based on what others think or say about you, but on how you feel about yourself.  You are perfect, just the way you are!

May you recognize that courage at times will mean you are afraid, but you can face your fears with positive thoughts and hard work, and conquer the fears head-on.  

May you always have a kind heart.  I wish the world was a kinder place, I wish your school and our community were kinder, but I can't make it so.  While so many in the world have a "me-first" attitude" I love that your kind and helping heart shines the brightest - always make the kind decision.  Be kind to yourself, but always remember that the world needs kind words, thoughts, and actions. The world needs people like you who are willing to cheer for the underdog, help those who are struggling, and the outsider who needs to be included.  You will witness and experience so much unkindness, but rise above.  Know who your friends are and value them.  

May you never forget how much you matter.  

May you continue to seek challenges and new adventures with joy and always see things through to the end.  If you commit to something, be it the school play, a volunteer role, or a committee - you stick with it.  You may not have to return or do it the next year, but each experience will hopefully bring you joy or at least knowledge of things you would like to do again, or never do again!  

May you face obstacles with the knowledge that you can and will overcome anything that disrupts your path.  It may not always be easy, but if the sun can shine after the darkest store, so will you!

May you someday realize that I loved you enough to worry and be obsessed with your health; and, to be overprotective. I know asking 10 - 20 times a day if you are okay, feeling okay, feel feverish is excessive, but I worry - a lot and I want you to have a life free of health worries and pain, so if my obsessive nagging questions assures I will have you open up when you are feeling sick or sad, it is worth it :)  And you have to admit, my new thermometer is much easier to quickly check a temp !!

And finally, being your Mom has been my greatest privilege and gift.  I prepared us both many years ago that our physical life together would be shorter than I wanted, but know since the moment you were born, I have fought to be with you, and every surgery, medicine, treatment, and even rotten hospital visit has been worth it if it meant I could continue to watch you become the amazing human you are.

You are stronger than you know, smarter than I ever hoped I could be, and your innocent and caring personality has been recognizable since you were an infant.  You have seen and witnessed so much in your 12 years and for that I am sorry, but if there is a silver lining I feel you are the kind soul you are because of your experiences.  Never change and know while I may not be here for your entire life, I will love you for the rest of mine.  The adventures will continue, here is to making more memories!

Happy Birthday, Greta Claire

Love Mommy