Howdy folks, just a hodge podge to update you on, I've been a slacker for sure. Greta is up to a whopping 9lbs 6oz, and just shy of 20inches. I feel for all those who wrote and said, my kid was more than that when he was born. I honestly can't imagine - I've seen it, but I can't imagine it for myself. Greta would have missed out on a lot of outfits!
I know her weight because we had our first office visit with Public Health, it was raining so hard that the streets were flooding, the parking lot looked more like a lake then a place to safely park a vehicle, but it didn't seem to phase her much. The nurse warned us we would hear crying like we had never before, she was right, Greta didn't care much for needles at all. Thankfully she is not following in my footsteps - she had no reactions to the needle. I was quite worried, I kept asking if my allergies would potentially be Greta's too, the nurse just said no, although no doubt wanted to hit me on the side of the head and tell me she'll add my comment to the psycho first time mothers book the write in and discuss at the staff Xmas Party.
Since Greta did fair out so well, we headed to NB, just the two of us. I should have taken a picture, the kid needs her own damn vehicle. It was ridiculous the amount of stuff, I think I'm going to advocate for the drivers license to be dropped, as 16 years of carrying her stuff greatly affects my shopping habits. Between the stroller, bouncey seat, play pen, then a suitcase of clothes, diapers, food, a few things for me...yikes. I could barely shop! She was in the back seat with loads of stuff. I bought a few Xmas presents on our journey, a few for her (not like she noticed), and started to pick up my Xmas wrap. Nothing like spending the last week of August at Price Club surrounding by Xmas items.
My niece Haley returned to the Island with us, we had an interesting talk on the way back. I being as anti drug as I am start telling her she is never ever, ever to do drugs. She assures me that she will never (I'm sure every adult heard that before), but I was informed that taking one cigarette takes 5 minutes off your life and drugs even more - they teach that at school!!! They certainly didn't teach that when I was 10 years old, but times are different now. She then informs me she is going to get a Sante Fe like me when she is 16, so I told her that turning 16 doesn't mean she gets a car, it means she gets a license - this was news to her!!! So I explained that she will need to go to university, get a good job, then maybe she will be able to afford a Santa Fe. This conversation was sinking in, until she asked how much, I said $40,000 and she told me she thought they would be $100...Oh, she has a lot of disappointment coming her way. She has changed her mind a little, didn't think saving $40,000 by the time she was 16 would be possible.
And the latest health update - I am alive!!! They performed the 2nd attempt of the liver biopsy this morning and they were successful at getting the samples, 3 in total. I was told I did good - otherwise known as, you didn't move or breath when we told you to stop breathing so the needle didn't puncture my lung or galbladder. Although I had a test run, it was very scary still. The nurses were wonderful, when they all recognize you, that isn't always a good sign that I'm healthy, I know all of their names, stuff about their kids and husbands, I know how to add an allergy to their computer system (seems to hold most of them up) and I can point out the veins that have collapsed so they won't puncture it again. I arrived at 7am, check in, get my allergy braclet on that is now so full they don't all fit in the white area that can be written on. I am immediately sent for blood work, despite having this done already, they wanted to ensure nothing changed. The funny part of this, as I'm walking down the hall with my file (I am of course reading it just to see if they have mental patient written on it somewhere), blood type and group is listed - pretty darn sure that hasn't changed, but no doubt, they recorded it wrong somewhere so better safe than sorry. They did that in case I needed a blood transfusion (which I didn't), they also check to make sure my blood will clot, success - we could proceed. I get in to my little room, have my locker for my clothes and they give me the biggest hospital gown I think they make. I'm not sure who this sucker was made for, but I could wrap it around me 3 times. The nurse assigned to deal with me (I mean care for me) got the IV in two tries...better than the 4 attempts last time. She did apologize for the massive bruise she caused, how nice!
Anyway, I get wheeled off to my procedure, no privacy in this hospital at all, they need underground tunnels, or secret passage ways, I just look like a sick patient being pushed around the halls. I guess I am, but the rest of the world doesn't need to know that. I am greeted with open arms by the same two nurses who were with me on the 1st Attempt, they were very reassuring, had the epi pen on standby and chatted about anything and everything but my liver. Then it came - the ativan. Seemed I was having a bit of a breakdown and anxiety attack, so they thought it would calm me down. It did work a bit - I was still crying, BUT, I kept my make up intact, they didn't have to take the towel to my face and wipe away tears like last time. I have decided that ativan should be a daily pill I take, why not, it will relax me, allow me to be under the influence so I can tell people where to go nicely and in a relaxed state, and I think it's rather cheap! They final have the room ready, Mom is given a seat in the hall way, she is upset because I yet again was talking about cancer and asking them to point things out on the ultrasound if they saw a tumour, they both said they are not expecting cancer, to get that out of my mind, people have biopsies all the time for other diagnostic tests. I know that too, but hard when you are from a family where cancer has affected so many to not think biopsy=cancer. Anyway, that is where the tears flowed a bit more, Mom was upset about this conversation too...The Dr comes in, I informed him he had one shot, after that, I was out of there. The anesthetic hurt like hell, burned, stung, felt like the needle when right through my entire body, but no reaction, it was a different kind of anesthetic and it definitely froze. Thankfully they didn't have to go in through my chest, this time I had to lie on my side and they went in between my ribs, so the incision is very high, but 3 separate samples were taken, the needle sounds like a little gun, the biggest risk is that I would jump from the noise, believe me, when you know that is a risk, even though the noise is bothersome each time, I was damn still...I send a farewell to my nurses as they took me to recovery, and I'm on to another great team in the recovery room. That part was a bit groggy, as I had to lie on my right side the entire time, I couldn't be nosey and see who else was in the recovery room with me, this is both good and bad. Good that I didn't have to see someone barfing or half naked across the room, bad because I have no fun stories to share! Recovery takes a while after this procedure, 5 hours of being monitored and having my vitals checked non stop, pretty much impossible to sleep. The nurse would tell me to shut my eyes and sleep for a bit, but just as I did - she was back poking me. Again, I have learned, you just don't sleep or rest in the hospital. So, that is a quick update. I'm in quite a bit of pain now, my liver, mixed with the post prego hormone crap has me having hot flashes non stop - God bless those in menopause - I am feeling the pain. I am not allowed to do much of anything, not even pick up the baby, I will behave, as internal bleeding sounds like a real drag.
Hope your week goes well, pretty boring post I know, I'll do something stupid or clumsy soon enough, fear not.
Toodles.
Someday my prince will come, but Daddy will always be King!
Daddy's Girl
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
How did I get here!!!
Good Evenings folks, back to back blogs, I'm even impressing myself! I had a busy day, an exhausting day, and a good day! Greta slept fairly good last night, she ate at midnight (aka, Daddy and Greta time) and slept through until 6am, I fed her and put her in the swing and we slept a few more hours, mind you, she really wanted to stay up, I wanted to continuously put the soother in her mouth and cross my fingers it would sooth her enough to whisk her off to dream land. I was wiped out. It seemed to be an off day for both of us, just a little cranky, over tired, hungry kind of day. I had my final appt with Dr. B, in a strange way, it is kind of sad to not have any more kids (I said strange, don't get idea's that I'm regretting the one kid decision, that is not where this blog entry is going), but sad that you find a great Dr and a great nurse and once the baby arrives, you get your walking papers and I will not have to return for appts. I was given the okay to start exercising AGAIN, those who really know me are laughing lots now. I use to exercise (yes, I was a good gymnast in my day, jogged, did insane sit ups every night), but then I quickly learned that I could keep my figure without killing myself, my metabolism mixed with bad eating habits, throw in crohns and presto, I just didn't have to worry about weight and hours in the gym burning calories. But the AGAIN part kind of threw me. I was informed that I have to take it easy but my c-section incision looked pretty good, so if I did a 10 intensity workout before, I can start off with a 1 intensity. It was hard not to laugh, and I refrained from embarrassing myself by asking, well, what if I was at a -10 for exercising intensity, do I slowly move up from that!!! Greta joined me for the appt, thankfully she didn't embarrass me while we were out, I was concerned, she didn't do the deed today (you know, the shit), so I had visions of an explosion in her car seat while sitting in a filled Dr's office with mothers-to-be sitting all around, I guess it may have been a good thing for the first time mothers, because I would have appreciated some warning about this, but mission accomplished, she was a very, very good girl. I also ran in to an old friend who is expecting her first baby any day now, so it was nice to chat and wish her well, she was feeling so many of the fears and anxiety I did just 8 weeks ago. Hard for me to tell someone it will all go okay, as I hated people telling me that, but I said it anyway, as I know she has a healthy baby on the way!
This appt also had me thinking...how in the heck did I get here (well, not technically), but this was not what I visioned. I'm a planner, a good planner, and I have visions, I see how things will work out, and I didn't see this coming. As I drove off from the appt I thought back as far as my poor memory could go to see if there were "signs" that someday a little baby girl would be sitting in my back seat, and nope!
I played with Barbies as a young girl, do you know what the Barbie did, she drove the fancy car, had the big motorhome, amazing house, hot boy toy, and had a great wardrobe (I mean this gal could shop)...but my Barbie NEVER had a baby, maybe there was one in the house, but she wasn't brought along on the outings that I recall...sign #1.
Cabbage Patch - now, maybe this was moving in the right direction, Meredith was my biggest Christmas Surprise ever. I never thought Santa would be able to get one, it was the first year they were out and people were knocking people to the floor to get one, standing in line for days hoping to get one ugly, stuffed doll (much like the IPhones last week), but she was all mine that Christmas morning. And although I adopted her, dressed her in cute clothes, I left her with a nanny to be watched....and I used the diapers to dress up our Cocker Spaniel Muffin. Sign #2.
Babysitting - Are you kidding, I wouldn't babysit, I didn't do diapers!!! No money in the world was worth that. I did walk the neighbours baby (umm, that sounds like it was a dog) - I mean, I would take the baby for a walk in the stroller, but that was it. I did watch my mothers friends daughter ONCE...she was 5 or 6 and a brat, she was sitting on top of a dresser and I told her to get down, she said I couldn't make her, I went to move her and she told me she would tell her mother I beat her. To this day, I kind of wish I did ! That was it for babysitting! Sign #3.
Well, I'll leave it at 3 signs, but I know there were more to indicate that a baby girl would never be sitting in my back seat, but she is! Greta has certainly been an unexpected surprise in our lives and I can finally admit that it is the biggest and most pleasant surprise I could have imagined. And not just because she is a great accessory, and I can dress her up and shop more (although that is a bonus point for her), but she is a sweet little baby girl and although she has only been on this earth for 8 weeks, we can't imagine our lives without her. I won't get the mother of the year award, not even mother of the week or even minute, but we are surviving, somewhat competent, sane (which is just as much of a surprise to me as it is to you reading) and we may actually do okay! We have our moments, and there are days that I want Darren to take over the stay at home role, and times I just want to make plans without thinking about a poop and eating schedule (for Greta - not me), but I guess our new life isn't too bad, it's just very, very different. As I see her personality blossoming, I am hoping this "boring" phase is over and it will become more fun and not feel like such a chore, people tell me that it will happen. Scarlet is looking forward to Greta being more "fun" too. I hope I can be healthy enough to enjoy it, it won't be fun for little Greta to have a sick Mommy. I will be out of commission next week, I am booked for a 2nd attempt at my liver biopsy on Monday, looks like they are admitting me and getting to the bottom of things. I'm still hoping I get to come home, not too interested in a hospital visit and their food, but better to get it over with now before Greta is more active and on the go.
This appt also had me thinking...how in the heck did I get here (well, not technically), but this was not what I visioned. I'm a planner, a good planner, and I have visions, I see how things will work out, and I didn't see this coming. As I drove off from the appt I thought back as far as my poor memory could go to see if there were "signs" that someday a little baby girl would be sitting in my back seat, and nope!
I played with Barbies as a young girl, do you know what the Barbie did, she drove the fancy car, had the big motorhome, amazing house, hot boy toy, and had a great wardrobe (I mean this gal could shop)...but my Barbie NEVER had a baby, maybe there was one in the house, but she wasn't brought along on the outings that I recall...sign #1.
Cabbage Patch - now, maybe this was moving in the right direction, Meredith was my biggest Christmas Surprise ever. I never thought Santa would be able to get one, it was the first year they were out and people were knocking people to the floor to get one, standing in line for days hoping to get one ugly, stuffed doll (much like the IPhones last week), but she was all mine that Christmas morning. And although I adopted her, dressed her in cute clothes, I left her with a nanny to be watched....and I used the diapers to dress up our Cocker Spaniel Muffin. Sign #2.
Babysitting - Are you kidding, I wouldn't babysit, I didn't do diapers!!! No money in the world was worth that. I did walk the neighbours baby (umm, that sounds like it was a dog) - I mean, I would take the baby for a walk in the stroller, but that was it. I did watch my mothers friends daughter ONCE...she was 5 or 6 and a brat, she was sitting on top of a dresser and I told her to get down, she said I couldn't make her, I went to move her and she told me she would tell her mother I beat her. To this day, I kind of wish I did ! That was it for babysitting! Sign #3.
Well, I'll leave it at 3 signs, but I know there were more to indicate that a baby girl would never be sitting in my back seat, but she is! Greta has certainly been an unexpected surprise in our lives and I can finally admit that it is the biggest and most pleasant surprise I could have imagined. And not just because she is a great accessory, and I can dress her up and shop more (although that is a bonus point for her), but she is a sweet little baby girl and although she has only been on this earth for 8 weeks, we can't imagine our lives without her. I won't get the mother of the year award, not even mother of the week or even minute, but we are surviving, somewhat competent, sane (which is just as much of a surprise to me as it is to you reading) and we may actually do okay! We have our moments, and there are days that I want Darren to take over the stay at home role, and times I just want to make plans without thinking about a poop and eating schedule (for Greta - not me), but I guess our new life isn't too bad, it's just very, very different. As I see her personality blossoming, I am hoping this "boring" phase is over and it will become more fun and not feel like such a chore, people tell me that it will happen. Scarlet is looking forward to Greta being more "fun" too. I hope I can be healthy enough to enjoy it, it won't be fun for little Greta to have a sick Mommy. I will be out of commission next week, I am booked for a 2nd attempt at my liver biopsy on Monday, looks like they are admitting me and getting to the bottom of things. I'm still hoping I get to come home, not too interested in a hospital visit and their food, but better to get it over with now before Greta is more active and on the go.
"Greta Claire, may you touch fireflies and stars, dance with fairies, and talk to the man in the moon. May you grow up with love and gracious hearts and people who care. Welcome to the world, little one. It's been waiting for you."
Toodles everyone!
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
The Things that consume my thoughts, day and the passing days
Again...a bit of a delay in writing my Blog, I am sad to say I haven't had much excitement in the way of adventures, but as I sit on my butt, appropriately in the exact same location I have sat for months, the lap top is on my lap (what a concept) and the TV is on (Glee Re-Runs) I am thinking about things I think about.
1) How is it possible that I look up baby bowel movements on the Internet more than I online shop?
A/ Because Greta shits green, then yellow, then takes a 24 hour break, then it's green again, then it's watery and landing on my lap (yes, it happened to me folks, it was so traumatic that I couldn't even devote a full blog to it, it was much, much funnier when it happened to Darren).
2) Why did my super duper metobolism choose to not fight off the cookies and kit kat bars (which I never liked before, but now seem to have for breakfast, lunch and supper)?
A/ Because metobolism thrives on chocolate, it craves the chocolate then says, sucker, I'm going to put those calories on your ass and make you pay for putting that crap in your body.
3) Why is it that I feel more connected to strangers and new friends than some friends that I have known for years?
A/ Because the strangers and the new friends have been there, emailed, visited or stretched out their hand, their ear and acted like friends.
4) Why can't I stop shopping for Greta?
A/ Because I am an addict...a shopping addict, drugs would be cheaper I'm sure. And, I was born with the shopping trait, it was the only gene I received from my mother since I don't look like anyone in my family, I was given the special skill of spending money. Really, how many knit outfits does one child need - I'll answer my question - 6, but if another cute one appears, maybe 7. And Headbands...oh my, thank you Krista D. for making such lovely headbands that I just have to have, I mean Greta has to have!!! Now, considering I have a collection of 20 headbands in the house and Greta is only 8 weeks old, I consider myself a great customer. Just think, I'm yet again helping the local economy! I seem to do that in NB and the USA as well.
5) How is it possible that one wedding on Days of Our Lives can take 5 days?
A/ While sitting on my butt, I have found myself eagerly (okay, that may be a tad much of an expression), but I will definitely turn the channel to watch Days of Our Lives. Now, University was 18 years ago, the same characters are on, same issues, for lord sake, they even look like they did 18 years ago, and time stands still. Sammy and EJ have been trying to get married for 5 friggin days, of course it gets stopped just as they were going to be announced as Husband and Wife, and what do you know, it's 2:59, the scene continues to the next day, again, 2:59, still waiting to deal with the problem. This is a justice of the peace wedding, believe me, I know for a fact and by experience the ceremony takes 5 minutes, not even a bilingual Catholic wedding with 10 objections would take as long as the Soap Opera Wedding.
6) How did the past year go by so quickly?
A/ This past weekend marked the one year anniversary for the most scandalous event that rocked Rustico - Darren and I eloped. Now, I'm sure my picture is still hanging in shop windows in the little village, "keep the sinner away" is the tag line, but wow, one year already. HOLY F... ONE YEAR and we have a baby...what the hell!!! One of the many reasons I was not marrying in the Catholic Church (besides the biggie that I'm not Catholic) was that I refused to say that the kids we were NOT going to have would be raised Catholic. HA. Let me tell you, one year ago, I never in a million, trillion years would have thought we would require a babysitter (thank you Mom) to watch a baby so we could go out and recognize our Anniversary. The only thing I can guarantee, there will not be TWO kids to babysit on our Second Anniversary!
7) Why is it frowned upon if I take a baby to a bar?
A/ I'm just thinking trivia, I would hide her under the table, people don't smoke anymore so she won't inhale second hand smoke she will just smell peoples feet!! It's so loud that I'm sure no one would hear her if she cried!
8) How is it possible that when we finally have an opportunity to go out (because my mother so kindly came over for our anniversary weekend)...did we just want to sleep? I don't think we spoke 5 minutes at supper we were just both in a trance thinking about sleep, I didn't even want to eat, I just wanted to sleep - and WHY, did we go out and find kids at the restaurant, including an 8 week old baby!!!
A/ First, for the record, we were not at McD's, which is why I am confused that there were children at the restaurant...McD's has a play room, therefore, children are acceptable to be there, the restaurant we were at DID NOT have a play room, therefore not acceptable for children to be there!!! Get with the program people! And sleep, we both like sleep, we get a fair amount of sleep, but it's a tad broken for our liking, sleep would have been better than supper!
9) Why is it that Darren offering to change a crappy, stinking, knock your socks off toxic waste diaper comes with a plan?
A/ Funny isn't it, but 2 dirty diapers yesterday meant Darren went fishing for the evening! Then I'm told I should do supper with the gals...ummm, a scam I tell you.
10) What do dogs and babies dream about?
A/ As I sit finishing my list of things I think about...Scarlet and Greta are both dreaming. Scarlet is wimpering, Greta grins here and there and sighs, I wonder what they are thinking about? I think Greta is dreaming about Daddy changing her and feeding her (I better go wake Darren to fill him in on this ability I have to read in to her dreams, who is he to deny her wishes) and I bet Scarlet is dreaming about chasing her ball followed by a lovely sleep in the spare room with Mommy (that is me).
So, a little insight, nothing too exciting. I do have to send out a huge thank you to my mother, she was over this weekend so we could get out to trivia and supper Friday night, followed by an evening out for our anniversary on Saturday. Not to mention the non stop flow of gifts that enter this house that I declare in this blog - has to stop. Darren is already trying to deal with my clothes, when I inform him that Greta's closet and two dressers are full with clothes and I have bags sitting in the 2nd closet, he may get a tad annoyed (whoops, he reads this blog!). And a huge thank you to Darren for putting up with a very tough first year of marriage, that sickness and health line in the vows - well, lets just say, he got the shit end of that deal. We got married at the end of August, arrived home to a luke warm reception that has affected us to this day immensely, and I have been sick since October. H1N1, Pneumonia (x2), Pregnant, C-Section, Liver failure...ummmm, I better find him a mistress soon, I'm all for polygamy, lord, I could use a wife (I hope she cleans and cooks and does diapers). I must share quickly one of my gifts for our anniversary. He is always very thoughtful with gifts, but recognized Paper as the Traditional first gift (now as my mother says, that means CASH), but he actually contacted the Publisher in North Conway, New Hampshire and had the paper printed from our wedding day in to a binder. Very thoughtful...I just gave him a gift card and a bottle of wine...ummm, next year watch out! Hope he sticks with this traditional gift scheme, I see some jewels coming my way!
Toodles for now, have a great week. PS. I have to go feed Greta, so I'm skipping spell check tonight so I can get this published...
1) How is it possible that I look up baby bowel movements on the Internet more than I online shop?
A/ Because Greta shits green, then yellow, then takes a 24 hour break, then it's green again, then it's watery and landing on my lap (yes, it happened to me folks, it was so traumatic that I couldn't even devote a full blog to it, it was much, much funnier when it happened to Darren).
2) Why did my super duper metobolism choose to not fight off the cookies and kit kat bars (which I never liked before, but now seem to have for breakfast, lunch and supper)?
A/ Because metobolism thrives on chocolate, it craves the chocolate then says, sucker, I'm going to put those calories on your ass and make you pay for putting that crap in your body.
3) Why is it that I feel more connected to strangers and new friends than some friends that I have known for years?
A/ Because the strangers and the new friends have been there, emailed, visited or stretched out their hand, their ear and acted like friends.
4) Why can't I stop shopping for Greta?
A/ Because I am an addict...a shopping addict, drugs would be cheaper I'm sure. And, I was born with the shopping trait, it was the only gene I received from my mother since I don't look like anyone in my family, I was given the special skill of spending money. Really, how many knit outfits does one child need - I'll answer my question - 6, but if another cute one appears, maybe 7. And Headbands...oh my, thank you Krista D. for making such lovely headbands that I just have to have, I mean Greta has to have!!! Now, considering I have a collection of 20 headbands in the house and Greta is only 8 weeks old, I consider myself a great customer. Just think, I'm yet again helping the local economy! I seem to do that in NB and the USA as well.
5) How is it possible that one wedding on Days of Our Lives can take 5 days?
A/ While sitting on my butt, I have found myself eagerly (okay, that may be a tad much of an expression), but I will definitely turn the channel to watch Days of Our Lives. Now, University was 18 years ago, the same characters are on, same issues, for lord sake, they even look like they did 18 years ago, and time stands still. Sammy and EJ have been trying to get married for 5 friggin days, of course it gets stopped just as they were going to be announced as Husband and Wife, and what do you know, it's 2:59, the scene continues to the next day, again, 2:59, still waiting to deal with the problem. This is a justice of the peace wedding, believe me, I know for a fact and by experience the ceremony takes 5 minutes, not even a bilingual Catholic wedding with 10 objections would take as long as the Soap Opera Wedding.
6) How did the past year go by so quickly?
A/ This past weekend marked the one year anniversary for the most scandalous event that rocked Rustico - Darren and I eloped. Now, I'm sure my picture is still hanging in shop windows in the little village, "keep the sinner away" is the tag line, but wow, one year already. HOLY F... ONE YEAR and we have a baby...what the hell!!! One of the many reasons I was not marrying in the Catholic Church (besides the biggie that I'm not Catholic) was that I refused to say that the kids we were NOT going to have would be raised Catholic. HA. Let me tell you, one year ago, I never in a million, trillion years would have thought we would require a babysitter (thank you Mom) to watch a baby so we could go out and recognize our Anniversary. The only thing I can guarantee, there will not be TWO kids to babysit on our Second Anniversary!
7) Why is it frowned upon if I take a baby to a bar?
A/ I'm just thinking trivia, I would hide her under the table, people don't smoke anymore so she won't inhale second hand smoke she will just smell peoples feet!! It's so loud that I'm sure no one would hear her if she cried!
8) How is it possible that when we finally have an opportunity to go out (because my mother so kindly came over for our anniversary weekend)...did we just want to sleep? I don't think we spoke 5 minutes at supper we were just both in a trance thinking about sleep, I didn't even want to eat, I just wanted to sleep - and WHY, did we go out and find kids at the restaurant, including an 8 week old baby!!!
A/ First, for the record, we were not at McD's, which is why I am confused that there were children at the restaurant...McD's has a play room, therefore, children are acceptable to be there, the restaurant we were at DID NOT have a play room, therefore not acceptable for children to be there!!! Get with the program people! And sleep, we both like sleep, we get a fair amount of sleep, but it's a tad broken for our liking, sleep would have been better than supper!
9) Why is it that Darren offering to change a crappy, stinking, knock your socks off toxic waste diaper comes with a plan?
A/ Funny isn't it, but 2 dirty diapers yesterday meant Darren went fishing for the evening! Then I'm told I should do supper with the gals...ummm, a scam I tell you.
10) What do dogs and babies dream about?
A/ As I sit finishing my list of things I think about...Scarlet and Greta are both dreaming. Scarlet is wimpering, Greta grins here and there and sighs, I wonder what they are thinking about? I think Greta is dreaming about Daddy changing her and feeding her (I better go wake Darren to fill him in on this ability I have to read in to her dreams, who is he to deny her wishes) and I bet Scarlet is dreaming about chasing her ball followed by a lovely sleep in the spare room with Mommy (that is me).
So, a little insight, nothing too exciting. I do have to send out a huge thank you to my mother, she was over this weekend so we could get out to trivia and supper Friday night, followed by an evening out for our anniversary on Saturday. Not to mention the non stop flow of gifts that enter this house that I declare in this blog - has to stop. Darren is already trying to deal with my clothes, when I inform him that Greta's closet and two dressers are full with clothes and I have bags sitting in the 2nd closet, he may get a tad annoyed (whoops, he reads this blog!). And a huge thank you to Darren for putting up with a very tough first year of marriage, that sickness and health line in the vows - well, lets just say, he got the shit end of that deal. We got married at the end of August, arrived home to a luke warm reception that has affected us to this day immensely, and I have been sick since October. H1N1, Pneumonia (x2), Pregnant, C-Section, Liver failure...ummmm, I better find him a mistress soon, I'm all for polygamy, lord, I could use a wife (I hope she cleans and cooks and does diapers). I must share quickly one of my gifts for our anniversary. He is always very thoughtful with gifts, but recognized Paper as the Traditional first gift (now as my mother says, that means CASH), but he actually contacted the Publisher in North Conway, New Hampshire and had the paper printed from our wedding day in to a binder. Very thoughtful...I just gave him a gift card and a bottle of wine...ummm, next year watch out! Hope he sticks with this traditional gift scheme, I see some jewels coming my way!
Toodles for now, have a great week. PS. I have to go feed Greta, so I'm skipping spell check tonight so I can get this published...
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Genie - What a Crock of Sh*t.
Today I am going to talk about the infamous Diaper Genie! Now, unlike my hope, this is no genie in a bottle, believe me, I rub this sucker a few times a day waiting for some hot looking genie to pop out, hell, I would settle for a fat ulgy looking genie, I just want my three friggin wishes! Who came up with this name anyway, there is no wishes granted, just a capsule of toxic waste!
For those who do not know what a diaper genie is, let me try to paint a picture (and for the record, I really do think it's a great invention, despite the image I may explain). The Diaper Genie (we have the Elite - just to make it that much more special) is a white hard plastic tube that somewhat resembles a nuclear warhead, it conveniently stores the toxic waste that comes out of darling little Greta. Greta gets changed, we fold up the diaper in a nice little package (unless it's one of the dosey diapers, in which case I personally layer about 10 clean wipes on it, somewhat try to roll the diaper small enough to fit into the diaper genie hole, all while attempting to avoid leaking the toxic shit anywhere from the changing table to the nuclear waste holder). Basically, the diaper genie holds dirty, smelly, wet, toxic diapers, seals them in a plastic bag and when full, guess what, you have a diaper sausage. Darren is demonstrating the diaper sausage in the picture taken by our friend Rachel Peters (if you can imagine, what he is holding was just 36 hours worth of diapers).
When Greta first arrived home we could just step on the foot pedal and torpedo the diaper in to the genie, but now, they are getting bigger. We moved Greta out of the newborn diapers into size 1 despite them being a tad big for her (more room in the butt for the explosions she has come to be known for), so we are actually now having to give the diaper a bit of a nudge down the chute. Let me tell you, I gag my way through diaper changes, despite being wrapped in numerous clean wipes, touching these diapers makes me want to vomit, if the toxic smell wasn't so bad, I may vomit in the diaper genie. The genie does hold in the smell to some degree, it is sealed, but those few moments when you have to open it to add another diaper, barf!! It's hot in Greta's room, so I can't imagine the smell of diapers sitting in a garbage can in a hot room, sun beating down on it, I assume it would be like the manure piles you see on the farms with the toxic haze above it. But this elite machine needs to start working more...as Greta gets older, the diapers are getting more toxic. I find myself praying (and I'm not the praying kind) that Darren will be the one to hold her when she decides to move her bowels, I swear, I whisper in this 7 week old baby's ear and tell her I'll buy her presents if she will just shit on his watch. But sadly, tonight wasn't my night. Darren had a tote full of clams to boil (of course, this means he is outside, as I don't allow him to cook or eat fish in the house), so I am feeding Greta and what do you know, just as he hands her off to me, the rumble happens, the rocket launch, the red face, clenched fits, lower lip pout and KABOOM. Thankfully, it's not pouring out either side of her legs (thank you Size 1 Diaper), but the smell is weakening my already weak immune system, I truly feel brain cells dying, my eyes start to water and my liver is getting more damaged. I have visions that this toxic chemical will have me glowing in the dark and peeing neon. After me moaning and wiping tears away, and me demonstrating my lower lip pout, Darren thankfully agrees to change Greta. Thank goodness as I was in and out of a coma, I may have actually fallen in to that crap while changing her!
So, just a little glimpse in to my day, I don't know if there is a more disgusting smell then warm, dirty diapers sitting in a plastic tube that doesn't hold true to it's name and produce a friggin Genie. But I'm sure warm dirty diapers sitting in a regular garbage can could prove worse, so if you are expecting a baby, go buy one, or give one as a shower gift...Money well spent!
As for my wishes - Just Three - I would wish for Health, Wealth and one Awesome Nanny!
All for now, Toodles!
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Rare complication
I'm hijacking Greta's blog with my hospital adventure update, as it's way too long to write on Facebook and it's worth of an "Only Gail" story...here is my journey to a liver biopsy!
Are you all sitting (well, of course you are, you are sitting at the computer). I am back home from my hospital ordeal.
Here is the update:
5:30 - Up and getting ready to go
6:45 - Arrive and get admitted
7:00 - In my bed, getting the vitals checked, signing my consent forms and reading about the biopsy
7:20 - 4 attempts to get an IV in, 3 nurses, two rolled veins, one miss, the 4th one is in.
8:20 - Wheeled to radiology where the biopsy is taking place, two great nurses review everything with me, which includes the risks, step by step of what they will do, etc. In amongst this I'm told about potential bleeding, potential puncture of the lung, gallbladder, bowel, and in very RARE circumstances, they will not be able to do the procedure. I was informed they may have to try a few times (although again, very RARE) but if the Dr is not happy with the site they will try again or abandon the attempt.
8:30 - Dr comes in, he is very, very nice and explains everything again, does an ultrasound to confirm where my liver is, this makes me feel good as I read they could just "tap" your chest to find it, that wasn't going over well with me.
Then the time line goes fuzzy, but they find a spot after 10 minutes to puncture me, I am marked just below the rib cage and they prep for the procedure, dresses, iodine, my hands are held down, and the anesthetic goes in - hurts like crazy, takes the knife and touches it to see if I feel anything - and of course I do, so more anesthetic goes in. Finally frozen, slice is made, needle is inserted (which is the length of a straw), and the Dr starts to verify with the ultrasound where he is going to take the sample from, 10 minutes later, he is still looking and pulls the biopsy needle out and says he didn't feel comfortable with that spot as it was too close to my small intestine, so we are going to have to start over with a different site. I'm bawling, some out of fear, other because of the pain and moreso because that RARE chance scenario is happening to me yet again.
9:00 - The nurse goes to give Mom an update as I was only suppose to be in there for a 10 minutes, 2nd Dr is asked to come in and assist.
9:15 - 2nd site is marked, they are going in the middle of my chest instead of the right side. Both Dr's think this is do-able. They prep the site again, sterilize everything again and go through what they will do for the second attempt.
9:30 - ARE YOU READY, this is when it gets good, the anesthetic is going in and I'm in agony, I tell the Dr and Nurses something feels wrong and it's extremely painful and burning, my chest starts to freeze, and then I feel my lips going numb, I tell the Dr and Nurses and the nurse says it may have hit a nerve not to worry, I'm crying and she is wiping away the tears and my makeup. Then my foot goes numb, the Dr takes a step back and looks concerned then I see the nurses face (the holy lord what is happening type of look), the second nurse goes running out of the room - this is not a good sign. (Mom is outside waiting and keeps seeing people coming and going from the room and later tells me the nurse ran out of the room that fast she almost knocked someone over). I am having an allergic reaction to the damn anesthetic. Now, I have told them about my complications but this is a dosey, the nurse said before her eyes I had a rash developing all over my neck and chest, they are removing my clothes and the 2 Dr's and the 2 Nurses are now just watching me. Then my throat starts to close over and I'm gasping for breath. The nurse who went running has returned and then stabs me in the hip...holy frig, it hurt! No warning, I assumed they would put something in the IV, but I guess stopping an allergic reaction is best done in the hip.
So, here is the end result, I have two incision points, one just a needle puncture, the other they actually cut and the needle was in, but my liver is intact. They had to abandon and will re-book. Let me tell you, I am not going back, I don't give one hoot what is wrong with my liver, they can let me suffer. Still had to go to recovery, but have made it back home. The freezing is wearing off, the allergy meds are making me very sleepy and I still have to recover for NOTHING.
I bet you think I make this crap up...The nurse said it's so rare for an allergic reaction, but that I can never have that anesthetic again as it will be much worse - WORSE - Are you kidding me, I broke out in seconds, and had to gasp for air.
Anyway, I'm alive, hard to believe I know!!!!! Still have to recover from the cut, but not a big deal, I'm a bit sore, but don't have to pain internally.
Are you all sitting (well, of course you are, you are sitting at the computer). I am back home from my hospital ordeal.
Here is the update:
5:30 - Up and getting ready to go
6:45 - Arrive and get admitted
7:00 - In my bed, getting the vitals checked, signing my consent forms and reading about the biopsy
7:20 - 4 attempts to get an IV in, 3 nurses, two rolled veins, one miss, the 4th one is in.
8:20 - Wheeled to radiology where the biopsy is taking place, two great nurses review everything with me, which includes the risks, step by step of what they will do, etc. In amongst this I'm told about potential bleeding, potential puncture of the lung, gallbladder, bowel, and in very RARE circumstances, they will not be able to do the procedure. I was informed they may have to try a few times (although again, very RARE) but if the Dr is not happy with the site they will try again or abandon the attempt.
8:30 - Dr comes in, he is very, very nice and explains everything again, does an ultrasound to confirm where my liver is, this makes me feel good as I read they could just "tap" your chest to find it, that wasn't going over well with me.
Then the time line goes fuzzy, but they find a spot after 10 minutes to puncture me, I am marked just below the rib cage and they prep for the procedure, dresses, iodine, my hands are held down, and the anesthetic goes in - hurts like crazy, takes the knife and touches it to see if I feel anything - and of course I do, so more anesthetic goes in. Finally frozen, slice is made, needle is inserted (which is the length of a straw), and the Dr starts to verify with the ultrasound where he is going to take the sample from, 10 minutes later, he is still looking and pulls the biopsy needle out and says he didn't feel comfortable with that spot as it was too close to my small intestine, so we are going to have to start over with a different site. I'm bawling, some out of fear, other because of the pain and moreso because that RARE chance scenario is happening to me yet again.
9:00 - The nurse goes to give Mom an update as I was only suppose to be in there for a 10 minutes, 2nd Dr is asked to come in and assist.
9:15 - 2nd site is marked, they are going in the middle of my chest instead of the right side. Both Dr's think this is do-able. They prep the site again, sterilize everything again and go through what they will do for the second attempt.
9:30 - ARE YOU READY, this is when it gets good, the anesthetic is going in and I'm in agony, I tell the Dr and Nurses something feels wrong and it's extremely painful and burning, my chest starts to freeze, and then I feel my lips going numb, I tell the Dr and Nurses and the nurse says it may have hit a nerve not to worry, I'm crying and she is wiping away the tears and my makeup. Then my foot goes numb, the Dr takes a step back and looks concerned then I see the nurses face (the holy lord what is happening type of look), the second nurse goes running out of the room - this is not a good sign. (Mom is outside waiting and keeps seeing people coming and going from the room and later tells me the nurse ran out of the room that fast she almost knocked someone over). I am having an allergic reaction to the damn anesthetic. Now, I have told them about my complications but this is a dosey, the nurse said before her eyes I had a rash developing all over my neck and chest, they are removing my clothes and the 2 Dr's and the 2 Nurses are now just watching me. Then my throat starts to close over and I'm gasping for breath. The nurse who went running has returned and then stabs me in the hip...holy frig, it hurt! No warning, I assumed they would put something in the IV, but I guess stopping an allergic reaction is best done in the hip.
So, here is the end result, I have two incision points, one just a needle puncture, the other they actually cut and the needle was in, but my liver is intact. They had to abandon and will re-book. Let me tell you, I am not going back, I don't give one hoot what is wrong with my liver, they can let me suffer. Still had to go to recovery, but have made it back home. The freezing is wearing off, the allergy meds are making me very sleepy and I still have to recover for NOTHING.
I bet you think I make this crap up...The nurse said it's so rare for an allergic reaction, but that I can never have that anesthetic again as it will be much worse - WORSE - Are you kidding me, I broke out in seconds, and had to gasp for air.
Anyway, I'm alive, hard to believe I know!!!!! Still have to recover from the cut, but not a big deal, I'm a bit sore, but don't have to pain internally.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
What Next...
Just a quick hello to my followers (I have a cult forming, of sick minded folks who take pleasure of my shit / puke / exhaustion stories...ha). Update of the night -little Greta has vocal cords, we were worried for a bit, didn't hear her cry much, but the poor little thing has a few belly pains this week and has shown her discomfort through her voice. Still not a shrilling noise, although I did find myself saying shut up a few times, not in a mean way, kind of a Give Me a Break you have been upset for an hour, just move your bowels already kind of way. She may be experiencing a growth spurt as well as she has been a hungry gal.
I find the days long, it has been nice to feel like I can finally drive and get out - but new issue has surfaced - where in the heck do I go. The mall just means I buy things I don't need, most are working or busy, I guess I could just aimlessly drive around town, polluting the earth with my gas guzzling SUV, or stay put and ensure the couch doesn't move while trying to figure out why in the heck Sammy is going to marry EJ on Days of Our Lives. Greta and I did have one fun adventure this week, we went headband shopping. Had a full table of headbands during a private showing at Krista Dykstra's house in Rustico, how much fun. Of course, I thought hard about her wardrobe and picked various headbands to match...I think we left with 7 to add to her collection. Well, you didn't think I could just buy one did you??? They'll now randomly appear in pictures.
We did have a lovely visit last night, one of my oldest and dearest friends Chris, his wife Julie and their little baby Emily were on the Island to visit (well, he was here to work, but we'll just pretend they came for a special visit). So wonderful to finally meet Emily, I had tried a few weeks before Greta arrived, but a solo journey to Moncton at 37 weeks prego was frowned upon and I just didn't make it. It was unreal to see the difference in the two girls, just a 7 week age difference, but quite something to see Emily's personality, strength, size, alertness...Cute as a button. That is obviously who is in the picture with Greta. Amazing that Chris and I, after knowing each other since we were junior high kids at Bessborough School have two babies sitting
in a crib together, life works in mysterious ways and I hope Emily and Greta will have many more visits together, if nothing else, I know they will be great Facebook Buddies (or whatever technology is available for young gals in a few years!)
And, as many know, just as I'm finally getting back on my feet after the c-section and Greta turns 7 weeks, I am heading back in to the hospital. Tomorrow I will have a liver biopsy, I just can't wait...well, I could, but somewhat pleased it will be over with, hoping to have no complications, as the complications range from bruising to internal bleeding to death, ummm, not what you want to read...but we'll see. Surely for once, luck will be on my side and the Dr will hit the liver, not the lung. Hopefully there is no chance for an allergic reaction, or ripping off the toe nail. Surely, I can stay away from people with pink eye and return home to rest. I am spending the day and being optimistic that I will get to go home the same day, although I am prepared for a one night stay, really, how bad can it be I'll be waited on, people will pay attention to me, I'll be fed (mind you it's hospital food, but better than what I have been eating), I won't have to change diapers, do laundry, make formula, it will be some me time...Hard pressed for some me time wouldn't you say! I would have preferred a pedicure, but I'm still missing a toe nail, so that would kind of look silly, Liver Biopsy wins! Thanks to those who sent positive vibes my way, I think all will go fine and tomorrow by 9am I'll be in recovery and it will all be behind me.
I better go get my pre surgery drink in to me (water folks, not liquor) they are taking a piece of the liver, better not have it saturated with vodka or rum. I'll be back soon.
Toodles - GE
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Things That are MISSING from the Baby Books and Chats
Hi folks, just checking in. Again I am falling behind on my blog updates, there hasn't been much exciting in our world, limited "adventures" you could say. But I'm up early today, Greta is down for her nap (well, it's more like she was awake for food, she still sleeps most of the day) and I thought it was time to share some wisdom. HA, for your health and the health of your children and grandchildren, don't use this wisdom, moreso read it and wonder how Greta has survived. I had Greta to the Dr yesterday and admitted that I'm like a 12 year old with a baby, although a 12 year old may think it's cool, I just recognize it as hard work. Greta had a healthy report, I knowing NOTHING and reading too many medical internet sites called last week about the power puke / bowel movements every 24 hour issue. The update from the appt: the Dr was kind enough to not say I just wasted her time, but seems all of this is normal. Greta is a petite little gal weighing in at 8lbs 6oz, as the 7th week approaches it still amazes me how many new discoveries I am making - THAT NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT!! So, here are the few things I have noticed that are missing from the baby books.
1) SHIT (You didn't think I would write a blog without adding this)... As a new mother the google searches are no longer Banana Republic, J. Crew and Ebay (well, I do still search) but they are now shit related: color, frequency, odour, what is normal, what isn't...And guess what, it's all there, there are mommy forums, medical sites, blogs...shit stories are everywhere. People, I have crohns and I have NEVER read so much about shit as I have since Greta's arrival. That is saying something! And who knew I would pick up the phone to call a Dr because of baby shit...And it's one thing to change diapers, but you will start recording pee and bowel movements on a chart / on the computer / in a book, but somewhere, sometime, you will have a book that is coded...my daytimer now has a list of food and crap incidents throughout the day - no where on those pagers does it say pedicure, manicure or facial!
2) Your Spouse (if you manage to still speak after 6 weeks) will pass you in the hall as they go to sleep in the basement or spare room just to get a few hours of peace and quiet. The conversations if you do take a few minutes to chat, you guessed it, food and crap!
3) Nutrition - you will lose the weight, it's easy...you don't eat! I never liked chocolate, but let me tell you, it's an easy meal...I now grab a Kit Kat Bar for lunch, that is if I think of it. My body is full of Diet Pepsi and chocolate, no wonder I have medical issues. And I can't even blame it on a lack of time, I have tons of time to make food, but I have no desire.
4) The second you think the baby is asleep and pour a nice hot bath to escape for a few minutes, that peaceful baby will be awake!
5) When you think you are ahead of the game, reality will soon hit - YOU ARE NOT. The baby can be fed, clean, smell good, cute as a button in an adorable outfit and without fail, you will forget something, puke or shit will ruin the moment, you realize you are wearing slippers not shoes, lord, you may realize you are wearing pj's not pants and YOU WILL BE LATE!
6) Heating a bottle feels like the longest stretch of time you have ever experienced in your life.
7) Burp clothes - give me a break, they are the size of a facecloth, when you burp a baby, line the couch, the floor and wrap another RECEIVING BLANKET completely around the baby and keep the fingers crossed that the puke won't saturate through. So, lets do the math, approximately 6 feeds a day, 3 receiving blankets in use each time, that means if you have a puker, you need 18 blankets available to you each day. SO, there can never be too many receiving blankets, add them to the wish list, and if you are going to a shower, add them to the package! They will get used.
8) Self inflicted sleep deprivation - I am sure many new parents are tired because the baby has his/her day and nights mixed up, has colic, cries, just can't sleep, but I have a baby who is a pretty good sleeper, but why am I tired - because I worry! New parents beware, you will check non stop if the child is breathing. I will tell people this and almost without fail, people will say, "oh, I did that"...why didn't anyone tell me about this obsession, Darren thinks I'm a freak, so I keep saying everyone does it!!! I pray it will end soon (not her breathing, my obsession)...And not only do I check non stop if she is breathing, because she is such a shallow breather if I can't see her chest move up and down, I touch her, move her hand, touch her lips - you guessed it, this is STUPID..WHY, because then she is up. But I know she is breathing!
9) There is no chapter in the book that talks about friendships, but google it, you can actually find articles about friendships ending because of babies. It's a humbling experience to realize who your friends are, but the people you thought were your friends may surprise you and the individuals who you didn't expect are the ones to step up to the plate. It's quite fascinating actually, but I have learned in 7 weeks that maybe sometimes it's best to walk away and stop caring and embrace the new friendships that have been made.
10) Going to the store with a child is difficult, the car seats take up the entire shopping cart, it's impossible to push a cart and a stroller at the same time, and is it really necessary, you can eat chocolate bars, you don't need to get groceries! Actually, I have quickly learned what stores work best, Sobeys carts are better for Greta. Granted, she has only been there once. And when you are in the stores, and you hear a screaming child it still annoys you...just because you have a baby of your own does not mean you can handle the noise. I would like to thank the mother who took her child to Walmart the other day, who screamed non stop for 15 minutes, it made me appreciate my decision to leave Greta at home.
11) You will feel like a failure - so, this isn't all that nice of a comment, but it's true. I have at times just thrown my hands up in the air, a few times a week I say I can't do this anymore, I feel helpless at times, lonely at times, frustrated at times...and she is a good baby. For once the universe was nice to me and we have a baby with a good personality who rarely cries, I have no doubt I would feel like a failure more often if she wasn't so good..this is a self inflicted title, but there are just days when you want the world to leave you alone and you find yourself telling the 6 week old baby to Shut UP! Okay, maybe not all mothers will tell their baby to shut up - but I did...with company here!
12) These creatures are expensive. Diapers, formula, extra receiving blankets, clothes...I can name 100 items, there is no nice way to say this, they are going to cost you money!
13) YouTube - if in doubt, go to YouTube. There is everything on YouTube...We learned how to do baby massages to help with the shit, there is stuff about childbirth, funny videos to make you smile, I found Baby Einstein videos this morning for Greta to watch, you name it, it's there...
14) Thankfulness....and at the end of the day, when I smell like puke, shit, am tired out, shopping deprived, lonely, frustrated I am very thankful that we have this little creature in our house that has been delivered to us healthy and happy....it greatly helps that she is cute, maybe if she was ugly I would have a few more struggles..ha. No, on a serious note, with all of my health struggles and the shock and disbelief that we had a baby on the way, we are very, very thankful that she survived, that she was healthy and that she is doing so well. We know we are very lucky.
So, on that note, I shall try to escape to relax in the bath. I am heading back to the hospital for my liver biopsy on Thursday, just as I was finally feeling better they are going to take a piece of my organ...I'm a tad worried, moreso about the pain than the results, but talk about inconvenient. Preparing for medical stuff with a baby sucks, we both need a babysitter! I'll check in again soon, send along some blog ideas, I'll be lying around on the couch so can't imagine much is going to happen in my world in the coming days.
1) SHIT (You didn't think I would write a blog without adding this)... As a new mother the google searches are no longer Banana Republic, J. Crew and Ebay (well, I do still search) but they are now shit related: color, frequency, odour, what is normal, what isn't...And guess what, it's all there, there are mommy forums, medical sites, blogs...shit stories are everywhere. People, I have crohns and I have NEVER read so much about shit as I have since Greta's arrival. That is saying something! And who knew I would pick up the phone to call a Dr because of baby shit...And it's one thing to change diapers, but you will start recording pee and bowel movements on a chart / on the computer / in a book, but somewhere, sometime, you will have a book that is coded...my daytimer now has a list of food and crap incidents throughout the day - no where on those pagers does it say pedicure, manicure or facial!
2) Your Spouse (if you manage to still speak after 6 weeks) will pass you in the hall as they go to sleep in the basement or spare room just to get a few hours of peace and quiet. The conversations if you do take a few minutes to chat, you guessed it, food and crap!
3) Nutrition - you will lose the weight, it's easy...you don't eat! I never liked chocolate, but let me tell you, it's an easy meal...I now grab a Kit Kat Bar for lunch, that is if I think of it. My body is full of Diet Pepsi and chocolate, no wonder I have medical issues. And I can't even blame it on a lack of time, I have tons of time to make food, but I have no desire.
4) The second you think the baby is asleep and pour a nice hot bath to escape for a few minutes, that peaceful baby will be awake!
5) When you think you are ahead of the game, reality will soon hit - YOU ARE NOT. The baby can be fed, clean, smell good, cute as a button in an adorable outfit and without fail, you will forget something, puke or shit will ruin the moment, you realize you are wearing slippers not shoes, lord, you may realize you are wearing pj's not pants and YOU WILL BE LATE!
6) Heating a bottle feels like the longest stretch of time you have ever experienced in your life.
7) Burp clothes - give me a break, they are the size of a facecloth, when you burp a baby, line the couch, the floor and wrap another RECEIVING BLANKET completely around the baby and keep the fingers crossed that the puke won't saturate through. So, lets do the math, approximately 6 feeds a day, 3 receiving blankets in use each time, that means if you have a puker, you need 18 blankets available to you each day. SO, there can never be too many receiving blankets, add them to the wish list, and if you are going to a shower, add them to the package! They will get used.
8) Self inflicted sleep deprivation - I am sure many new parents are tired because the baby has his/her day and nights mixed up, has colic, cries, just can't sleep, but I have a baby who is a pretty good sleeper, but why am I tired - because I worry! New parents beware, you will check non stop if the child is breathing. I will tell people this and almost without fail, people will say, "oh, I did that"...why didn't anyone tell me about this obsession, Darren thinks I'm a freak, so I keep saying everyone does it!!! I pray it will end soon (not her breathing, my obsession)...And not only do I check non stop if she is breathing, because she is such a shallow breather if I can't see her chest move up and down, I touch her, move her hand, touch her lips - you guessed it, this is STUPID..WHY, because then she is up. But I know she is breathing!
9) There is no chapter in the book that talks about friendships, but google it, you can actually find articles about friendships ending because of babies. It's a humbling experience to realize who your friends are, but the people you thought were your friends may surprise you and the individuals who you didn't expect are the ones to step up to the plate. It's quite fascinating actually, but I have learned in 7 weeks that maybe sometimes it's best to walk away and stop caring and embrace the new friendships that have been made.
10) Going to the store with a child is difficult, the car seats take up the entire shopping cart, it's impossible to push a cart and a stroller at the same time, and is it really necessary, you can eat chocolate bars, you don't need to get groceries! Actually, I have quickly learned what stores work best, Sobeys carts are better for Greta. Granted, she has only been there once. And when you are in the stores, and you hear a screaming child it still annoys you...just because you have a baby of your own does not mean you can handle the noise. I would like to thank the mother who took her child to Walmart the other day, who screamed non stop for 15 minutes, it made me appreciate my decision to leave Greta at home.
11) You will feel like a failure - so, this isn't all that nice of a comment, but it's true. I have at times just thrown my hands up in the air, a few times a week I say I can't do this anymore, I feel helpless at times, lonely at times, frustrated at times...and she is a good baby. For once the universe was nice to me and we have a baby with a good personality who rarely cries, I have no doubt I would feel like a failure more often if she wasn't so good..this is a self inflicted title, but there are just days when you want the world to leave you alone and you find yourself telling the 6 week old baby to Shut UP! Okay, maybe not all mothers will tell their baby to shut up - but I did...with company here!
12) These creatures are expensive. Diapers, formula, extra receiving blankets, clothes...I can name 100 items, there is no nice way to say this, they are going to cost you money!
13) YouTube - if in doubt, go to YouTube. There is everything on YouTube...We learned how to do baby massages to help with the shit, there is stuff about childbirth, funny videos to make you smile, I found Baby Einstein videos this morning for Greta to watch, you name it, it's there...
14) Thankfulness....and at the end of the day, when I smell like puke, shit, am tired out, shopping deprived, lonely, frustrated I am very thankful that we have this little creature in our house that has been delivered to us healthy and happy....it greatly helps that she is cute, maybe if she was ugly I would have a few more struggles..ha. No, on a serious note, with all of my health struggles and the shock and disbelief that we had a baby on the way, we are very, very thankful that she survived, that she was healthy and that she is doing so well. We know we are very lucky.
So, on that note, I shall try to escape to relax in the bath. I am heading back to the hospital for my liver biopsy on Thursday, just as I was finally feeling better they are going to take a piece of my organ...I'm a tad worried, moreso about the pain than the results, but talk about inconvenient. Preparing for medical stuff with a baby sucks, we both need a babysitter! I'll check in again soon, send along some blog ideas, I'll be lying around on the couch so can't imagine much is going to happen in my world in the coming days.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Home Confinement
Another delay in my Blog updates - why you may ask, ummm, lets see, crap, vomit are a few to get me started. I see a life of Home confinement, bad enough that I was a prisoner to a c-section and unable to physically get around, but now that I feel a bit more competent to drive and carry Greta in her car seat, I'm house bound because she is a social nuisance...Yes, I called her a social nuisance! Bad mother note number 309 I'm sure!!!
Let me take you back a day, my FIRST outing with Greta, just she and I, off to visit our friends Amber and Baby Erik. We had the day planned, may have been a tad optimistic with saying we could do a visit at 10am, but I was determined it was going to happen.
So, lets see if I can give you a time line...
7:45 - Darren left for work, Greta still sleeping
8:15 - Left Greta sleeping but she is starting to wake up, start bath water
8:30 - Greta is up, my bath water is ready and cooling, so I give Greta her soother and place her in bouncey seat and along with the Dog, she sits on the bathroom floor as I enjoy 5 minutes (yes, 5) of a relaxing bath!
8:45 - I love soothers - Greta is patiently waiting for me to get dressed and get make up on and my hair done (I'm not setting up a visit and looking like total crap!!)
9:07 - I am sitting on the couch, all ready to go. While feeding Greta I message Amber to tell her that I'm on schedule, 53 minutes to feed her, see if she blows off a diaper (we were going on 24 hours with no Code Browns, I was starting to think it was coming) and get to our 10am Mommy / Baby visit
9:28 - My eyes are watering, no, I'm not tired, I'm trying to regain my composure as the shit came, and it came good! Holy lord, how can an 8lb child stink like this, where is this chapter in the baby books "Toxic Fumes - Beware". As I try to come to from the smell, I message Amber again, directly below my 9:07 note to say you better spot us 15 minutes.
9:30 - 9:45 - Oh my lord, it was a take your rings off, 15 wipes type of event, I think my nose is beyond repair, the diaper genie needs a mega deodorizer, and I had to open all the windows on one end of the house. And I was gagging, I mean really, really, really gagging, I was contemplating locking myself in the bathroom and calling Darren to come home to change her! But, one good thing - thank god she won't embarrass me on our visit, the shit is done, we are probably good to go for another 24 hour period. As I'm changing her, I realize there is a brownish / greenish stain on my shirt...holy F...
So back to the baby - I changed her. I dress her in a sweet little Green shirt with little white and pink roses on it, little pants that have GIRL written across the bum, and a matching hair band...she just looks adorable. I have to go find something else to wear for me!
9:45 - There is an ounce left in her bottle, she still seems hungry, I think hard about not giving it to her, but I do...SO...then I start to burp her again, praying it will be quick and not messy for me or her.
9:45 - I'm multi-tasking - I Email Darren to give him notice that the shit came and he owes me, he has the nerve to call me laughing his full fledged giggle, while I get more angry on the phone, he thinks it's funny she and I are both requiring a change. I ask him to call Amber and tell her I'm going to be running late...I can multi-task, but remember, I only have 2 hands, feeding her, typing with one hand, talking on the phone and trying to regain my sense of smell.
9:51 - Get a "LOL" message back from Amber about my predicament - a sign of support and understanding or a message saying Sucker...UMMM
10:00 - Suppose to be at Amber's, am not, BUT, I think I have a hope of just being 15 minutes late!
10:10 - OH my goodness, it's looking good, Greta didn't burp, but she did burp after all the other oz's, it was just that last mouthful and she is falling asleep, so I get her cute self into the car seat, tuck in her Winnie the Pooh along side her and make sure I have the keys, Amber's coffee order, diaper bag...oh yes, I'm bringing the baby, got her now in hand and out the door we go...I'm impressed, 10 minutes late is great for me....And then it happens...
10:10 and 5 seconds - SCENE - Just shut door and confirmed it was locked, about to take my first step down the front porch and BARFFFFFFFFF...Projectile Vomit is flowing through the car seat, Winnie looks like he got the brunt of it, that sweet outfit is now creamy white, Greta - smells like Barf (good thing, would be bad if she smelled like Jack Daniels which is what I wanted to smell like after this incident), and I'm ready to say it wasn't meant to be and cancel our visit...BUT NO, I said I was going to be there and by darn it, I'm going to make it happen.
10:11 - Take soaking wet kid and Winnie out of car seat, to expose the vomit that is now seeping through the fabric - I'm going to barf! Put baby on the counter, scrub seat, add Second Car Seat to the TO BUY LIST, put blanket on the seat (yes, I know you are not suppose to do it, but no choice), change Greta in to a sleeper - cute outfits are not cutting it, we are going for full protection, and I take a moment to wipe away a tear as I realize this is my life today and I just want to move away!
10:27 - Bla, bla, bla - hack, hack, hack - Are you freakin kidding me AGAIN, the damn cat is barfing, I am just about ready to open the liquor cabinet this is just ridiculous. I think about not picking it up, BUT, assume Scarlet would do it for me when I leave, so I am off to find the cat barf on the floor, praying it's not on the one bedroom floor that has carpet that is open to the cats!
10:30 - Lets try leaving again, soother is in the mouth, the smell of shit and now barf are fighting it out in my nostrils, I'm starting to really think babies need to all have Nanny's so they don't have to go out in public, and why are receiving blankets so freakin small - I'm going to invent Baby Barf Snuggly's or Vomit Poncho's, the face will be exposed but everything else is covered.
10:49 - Finally arrive at Amber's - somewhat impressed after the shit and barf show that we are still within the 10am-11am time frame, I settle in to her comfy couch, open up my hot chocolate - for a moment, contemplate asking if she has a shot of booze she can spot me for my hot chocolate, but realize I may not be able to stop and surely she doesn't want my drunk ass staying at her house all day, so I just sip and think, I wish this had liquor and I wish I had a Nanny! But, thanks for the visit, my first outing was a success - Well, we made it didn't we!!!
All this to say, I just may be sticking out the next 10 months, drunk, on my couch, watching Soap Opera's, getting fat because I'm eating junk food all the time, did I mention drinking...THIS will be the scene unless the little miss shows a more acceptable going out behavior. Next outing is a planned big one - NB on Saturday - I'm scared, really, really scared. If she embarrasses me at Price Club, that will be the last straw, she'll be cut off presents and teddy bears!
I am pretty sure 99% of the mothers out there told me, the first 6 weeks are the toughest, then it's like a magic switch and all calms down and the routine come - Well, it's 6 weeks today...I want the damn magic switch!!! OR A NANNY!
Let me take you back a day, my FIRST outing with Greta, just she and I, off to visit our friends Amber and Baby Erik. We had the day planned, may have been a tad optimistic with saying we could do a visit at 10am, but I was determined it was going to happen.
So, lets see if I can give you a time line...
7:45 - Darren left for work, Greta still sleeping
8:15 - Left Greta sleeping but she is starting to wake up, start bath water
8:30 - Greta is up, my bath water is ready and cooling, so I give Greta her soother and place her in bouncey seat and along with the Dog, she sits on the bathroom floor as I enjoy 5 minutes (yes, 5) of a relaxing bath!
8:45 - I love soothers - Greta is patiently waiting for me to get dressed and get make up on and my hair done (I'm not setting up a visit and looking like total crap!!)
9:07 - I am sitting on the couch, all ready to go. While feeding Greta I message Amber to tell her that I'm on schedule, 53 minutes to feed her, see if she blows off a diaper (we were going on 24 hours with no Code Browns, I was starting to think it was coming) and get to our 10am Mommy / Baby visit
9:28 - My eyes are watering, no, I'm not tired, I'm trying to regain my composure as the shit came, and it came good! Holy lord, how can an 8lb child stink like this, where is this chapter in the baby books "Toxic Fumes - Beware". As I try to come to from the smell, I message Amber again, directly below my 9:07 note to say you better spot us 15 minutes.
9:30 - 9:45 - Oh my lord, it was a take your rings off, 15 wipes type of event, I think my nose is beyond repair, the diaper genie needs a mega deodorizer, and I had to open all the windows on one end of the house. And I was gagging, I mean really, really, really gagging, I was contemplating locking myself in the bathroom and calling Darren to come home to change her! But, one good thing - thank god she won't embarrass me on our visit, the shit is done, we are probably good to go for another 24 hour period. As I'm changing her, I realize there is a brownish / greenish stain on my shirt...holy F...
So back to the baby - I changed her. I dress her in a sweet little Green shirt with little white and pink roses on it, little pants that have GIRL written across the bum, and a matching hair band...she just looks adorable. I have to go find something else to wear for me!
9:45 - There is an ounce left in her bottle, she still seems hungry, I think hard about not giving it to her, but I do...SO...then I start to burp her again, praying it will be quick and not messy for me or her.
9:45 - I'm multi-tasking - I Email Darren to give him notice that the shit came and he owes me, he has the nerve to call me laughing his full fledged giggle, while I get more angry on the phone, he thinks it's funny she and I are both requiring a change. I ask him to call Amber and tell her I'm going to be running late...I can multi-task, but remember, I only have 2 hands, feeding her, typing with one hand, talking on the phone and trying to regain my sense of smell.
9:51 - Get a "LOL" message back from Amber about my predicament - a sign of support and understanding or a message saying Sucker...UMMM
10:00 - Suppose to be at Amber's, am not, BUT, I think I have a hope of just being 15 minutes late!
10:10 - OH my goodness, it's looking good, Greta didn't burp, but she did burp after all the other oz's, it was just that last mouthful and she is falling asleep, so I get her cute self into the car seat, tuck in her Winnie the Pooh along side her and make sure I have the keys, Amber's coffee order, diaper bag...oh yes, I'm bringing the baby, got her now in hand and out the door we go...I'm impressed, 10 minutes late is great for me....And then it happens...
10:10 and 5 seconds - SCENE - Just shut door and confirmed it was locked, about to take my first step down the front porch and BARFFFFFFFFF...Projectile Vomit is flowing through the car seat, Winnie looks like he got the brunt of it, that sweet outfit is now creamy white, Greta - smells like Barf (good thing, would be bad if she smelled like Jack Daniels which is what I wanted to smell like after this incident), and I'm ready to say it wasn't meant to be and cancel our visit...BUT NO, I said I was going to be there and by darn it, I'm going to make it happen.
10:11 - Take soaking wet kid and Winnie out of car seat, to expose the vomit that is now seeping through the fabric - I'm going to barf! Put baby on the counter, scrub seat, add Second Car Seat to the TO BUY LIST, put blanket on the seat (yes, I know you are not suppose to do it, but no choice), change Greta in to a sleeper - cute outfits are not cutting it, we are going for full protection, and I take a moment to wipe away a tear as I realize this is my life today and I just want to move away!
10:27 - Bla, bla, bla - hack, hack, hack - Are you freakin kidding me AGAIN, the damn cat is barfing, I am just about ready to open the liquor cabinet this is just ridiculous. I think about not picking it up, BUT, assume Scarlet would do it for me when I leave, so I am off to find the cat barf on the floor, praying it's not on the one bedroom floor that has carpet that is open to the cats!
10:30 - Lets try leaving again, soother is in the mouth, the smell of shit and now barf are fighting it out in my nostrils, I'm starting to really think babies need to all have Nanny's so they don't have to go out in public, and why are receiving blankets so freakin small - I'm going to invent Baby Barf Snuggly's or Vomit Poncho's, the face will be exposed but everything else is covered.
10:49 - Finally arrive at Amber's - somewhat impressed after the shit and barf show that we are still within the 10am-11am time frame, I settle in to her comfy couch, open up my hot chocolate - for a moment, contemplate asking if she has a shot of booze she can spot me for my hot chocolate, but realize I may not be able to stop and surely she doesn't want my drunk ass staying at her house all day, so I just sip and think, I wish this had liquor and I wish I had a Nanny! But, thanks for the visit, my first outing was a success - Well, we made it didn't we!!!
All this to say, I just may be sticking out the next 10 months, drunk, on my couch, watching Soap Opera's, getting fat because I'm eating junk food all the time, did I mention drinking...THIS will be the scene unless the little miss shows a more acceptable going out behavior. Next outing is a planned big one - NB on Saturday - I'm scared, really, really scared. If she embarrasses me at Price Club, that will be the last straw, she'll be cut off presents and teddy bears!
I am pretty sure 99% of the mothers out there told me, the first 6 weeks are the toughest, then it's like a magic switch and all calms down and the routine come - Well, it's 6 weeks today...I want the damn magic switch!!! OR A NANNY!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Special Edition - Code Brown is for the Weak
Well, this extra blog is brought to you by Baby Oxy Clean.
Well, I already blogged once today, but I found it necessary to share a bit of our evening, it kind of made me giggle, kind of made me puke and if you read the earlier blog in which I was discussing SIGNS, well, I got a great SIGN tonight, when Greta yet again blew her diaper, the SIGN that immediately popped in to my head was an ad for a Nanny!
The scene - Greta has been "off" all day, our little gal who rarely cries seemed to be distressed, she barely slept all day and has been eating like a horse. We received an unexpected call from our friends Newf and Kim that they were coming for supper (they were bringing it with them), so we gathered a few things to add to the dinner, and Darren started to feed Greta. Still she was off, despite the food, we soon found out why...BOOM...no it wasn't a bomb dropping in the neighbourhood, it was an 8lb little gal exploding a days worth of shit in to her diaper. Now, I had just changed her, secured that diaper extra, extra tight, so tight I was confident that the cute white and polka dot dress romper she was wearing was a smart decision. Well, we only heard one explosion, most days there are a few, so what do I suggest - "Darren, just wait to change her, she probably isn't finished" Well, a few minutes pass, and nothing, so Darren goes to move her and off to change her... talk about someone stopping dead in their tracks. Not only did she blow through the pampers, on to her sweet little outfit, but she left a lovely present on Darren's lap (the kind of present that had a distinct odour and color - lets call it shit, oh my word, we both almost puked, Darren had to be changed, Greta had to be changed, this is much worse than code brown, this was Code Yellow, mixed with Green...Lord help us, it's only been 5 weeks, I can't handle the replacement cost of Darren and Greta's clothes! Anyway, Darren was gagging too much, and I guess he was covered in shit, so I had to change Greta - lets just say it was a 15 wipe kind of experience!
So, sweet dreams, or at least the Sweet Smell of Baby Shit. I guess being a parent means being able to embrace the shit. Love the shit. Become one with the shit because it will end up all over us eventually.
Well, I already blogged once today, but I found it necessary to share a bit of our evening, it kind of made me giggle, kind of made me puke and if you read the earlier blog in which I was discussing SIGNS, well, I got a great SIGN tonight, when Greta yet again blew her diaper, the SIGN that immediately popped in to my head was an ad for a Nanny!
The scene - Greta has been "off" all day, our little gal who rarely cries seemed to be distressed, she barely slept all day and has been eating like a horse. We received an unexpected call from our friends Newf and Kim that they were coming for supper (they were bringing it with them), so we gathered a few things to add to the dinner, and Darren started to feed Greta. Still she was off, despite the food, we soon found out why...BOOM...no it wasn't a bomb dropping in the neighbourhood, it was an 8lb little gal exploding a days worth of shit in to her diaper. Now, I had just changed her, secured that diaper extra, extra tight, so tight I was confident that the cute white and polka dot dress romper she was wearing was a smart decision. Well, we only heard one explosion, most days there are a few, so what do I suggest - "Darren, just wait to change her, she probably isn't finished" Well, a few minutes pass, and nothing, so Darren goes to move her and off to change her... talk about someone stopping dead in their tracks. Not only did she blow through the pampers, on to her sweet little outfit, but she left a lovely present on Darren's lap (the kind of present that had a distinct odour and color - lets call it shit, oh my word, we both almost puked, Darren had to be changed, Greta had to be changed, this is much worse than code brown, this was Code Yellow, mixed with Green...Lord help us, it's only been 5 weeks, I can't handle the replacement cost of Darren and Greta's clothes! Anyway, Darren was gagging too much, and I guess he was covered in shit, so I had to change Greta - lets just say it was a 15 wipe kind of experience!
So, sweet dreams, or at least the Sweet Smell of Baby Shit. I guess being a parent means being able to embrace the shit. Love the shit. Become one with the shit because it will end up all over us eventually.
SIGNS....
Serendipity? The signs out there, pointing you in the right direction, pushing you away from or towards things, people, experiences...Essentially it's the aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident. I have this skill, I see signs, visions (I know spooky), and I have allowed these signs to change the path in my life many, many times. For many years I was addicted, not to drugs or alcohol, but to the TEA LEAF LADY. Every time something went wrong, I was calling, she was like my personal shrink. Over the years she told me to get rid of men, gave me initials of men, told me how many years it would be for things to turn around, and she always said I would get married and have kids...TWINS actually. So, she was wrong with a few things, but I found one of my readings the other day and was taking a look. I am not even 100% sure who went with me as I don't recognize the handwriting, but it was quite a few years back, before my life changed in dramatic ways.
But I believed she knew what happened in the past, what was currently happening in my life and what the future would hold. How she knew is beyond me, I remember quite a few times her telling me to get rid of some guy, and I would be ticked off, and it always bothered me that she would see children in my cup, but I listened and said, I'll show you!!! I believe in signs, always have!
Do you know why I moved to PEI? I am here on PEI because of bathrooms, that is right, bathrooms. I was planning to attend Acadia University, was accepted in to an accelerated Bachelor program that would take me 3 years then do my Education degree, but since UPEI was free to apply for, I sent in my application, got accepted and my mother drove myself and two friends over to see the campus. And what do you know, there was a bathroom between two rooms, Acadia had a bathroom for a floor...So, that is how the PEI life began, a toilet, a bathtub won we over! A sign, or just me not liking the idea of a community bathroom!
Jobs...there were many signs, my first job offer after university (I mean the first REAL job, that I would be making a salary, not an hourly wage and it required an education kind of job) was with the head office of Irving in Saint John, NB, but there was a sign...well, more like a smell. I hate Saint John, the air did it for me, as you approached the city, I would start to gag, I remember crying the entire way to my final interview, as I knew the offer was coming. How backwards is that!!!??? When they slid the offer of a salary across the table (just like they do in the movies) I could feel tears well up in my eyes and I asked if I could have the weekend to think about the offer, I got back in the car and you guessed it, I cried the entire way home. That was a sign, I wrote them my rejection letter that evening! Maybe I was suppose to be a Come From Away Islander!
Men...there were signs - I listened to some, should have listened to others, but we'll just leave it at that, but when there is a sign in regards to men, unless it's a good sign - RUN!
Marriage...I never wanted to get married. Yes I like to plan and organize and many thought I would want a big wedding, but I never believed (nor do I believe) that there is just one soul mate who you are suppose to be with. Really, there is an entire world out there, and you just happen to think your soul mate is the person in your town, at your school, at your place of work. Maybe your soul mate is in the middle east, or Germany...But I do think there are a lot of soul mates for individuals, maybe each person has 10, and you have to weed them out. Anyway, I did what I never said I would, I got married. Not in the traditional way, we eloped and if I had to do it over again, I would elope again, with one major change - I wouldn't have told one single person. My mother says we had the worse elopement in history as some people knew, but I'm thinking if I was to do it over, I may announce we got married on our year anniversary, it would have provided me at least one year of being happily married without the pathetic "Disapproval" I have experienced since our elopement! And another reason I never wanted to get married, divorce is pretty expensive!
Kids...Never liked them, thankfully, I have grown a soft spot for Greta Claire, but it has not increased my like for other children, I actually think it has made my dislike for children stronger. They are really, really annoying. I see kids in the stores and just think - why can't your mother afford a babysitter! And these kids are not even being bad, before I just thought that about the screaming and crying kids. But, maybe Darren and I having a kid was destiny, fate, all the things I really don't believe in, as it certainly shouldn't have happened, but here I sit beside a little 8lb baby girl who is cooing at her Winnie the Pooh, no doubt thinking about POO-ING, and it almost seems like it was meant to be...I said ALMOST, don't think I'm getting all sentimental, I've had a few breakdowns this week and why me moments that have lead to conversations of me moving, returning to work, getting a divorce, running away to New Hampshire...BUT, I survived and am calm again (for the time being)! Granted, I really want to go out shopping, but am home alone with her and I guess it's frowned upon to let the Dog babysit her.
So, back to a few SIGNS:
The reason I came up with this topic if you can imagine was me watching You-Tube Video's. Greta loves Beyonce's Single Ladies Video (I'm teaching her young to go for the big Diamond), but as I was sitting down to my breakfast / lunch at 3:30 this afternoon, which consisted of a Twix Bar and a Diet Pepsi, I open up the computer and there it is, a highlighted section of Recommended Videos for YOU to watch, the first one: FAT - by Weird Al Yankovic. I almost threw the computer across the room, I'm feeling a tad pudgy, but come on, even the computer is sending me signs - I did finish the Twix bar, but I guess maybe I should just have Diet Pepsi for lunch from now on!
Summer Sales, it's a sign, the universe has missed me shopping, the credit card companies are going bankrupt and sending out search parties for me, the Confederation Bridge is wondering where in the hell I am - it's a sign that I need to get back in the swing of things and exercise my fingers on the Debit Machines and give the old credit cards a dusting off... If I feel better or not, watch out Moncton, I'm coming next weekend and it's going to be obscene. Then NH, Don't worry, I'm coming back, will be there soon.
So, whatever signs you see, follow them, maybe it's destiny sending you in the right direction. Lord do I ever hope I see a sign out there that says GREECE - I think I may just need to book a vacation.
But I believed she knew what happened in the past, what was currently happening in my life and what the future would hold. How she knew is beyond me, I remember quite a few times her telling me to get rid of some guy, and I would be ticked off, and it always bothered me that she would see children in my cup, but I listened and said, I'll show you!!! I believe in signs, always have!
Do you know why I moved to PEI? I am here on PEI because of bathrooms, that is right, bathrooms. I was planning to attend Acadia University, was accepted in to an accelerated Bachelor program that would take me 3 years then do my Education degree, but since UPEI was free to apply for, I sent in my application, got accepted and my mother drove myself and two friends over to see the campus. And what do you know, there was a bathroom between two rooms, Acadia had a bathroom for a floor...So, that is how the PEI life began, a toilet, a bathtub won we over! A sign, or just me not liking the idea of a community bathroom!
Jobs...there were many signs, my first job offer after university (I mean the first REAL job, that I would be making a salary, not an hourly wage and it required an education kind of job) was with the head office of Irving in Saint John, NB, but there was a sign...well, more like a smell. I hate Saint John, the air did it for me, as you approached the city, I would start to gag, I remember crying the entire way to my final interview, as I knew the offer was coming. How backwards is that!!!??? When they slid the offer of a salary across the table (just like they do in the movies) I could feel tears well up in my eyes and I asked if I could have the weekend to think about the offer, I got back in the car and you guessed it, I cried the entire way home. That was a sign, I wrote them my rejection letter that evening! Maybe I was suppose to be a Come From Away Islander!
Men...there were signs - I listened to some, should have listened to others, but we'll just leave it at that, but when there is a sign in regards to men, unless it's a good sign - RUN!
Marriage...I never wanted to get married. Yes I like to plan and organize and many thought I would want a big wedding, but I never believed (nor do I believe) that there is just one soul mate who you are suppose to be with. Really, there is an entire world out there, and you just happen to think your soul mate is the person in your town, at your school, at your place of work. Maybe your soul mate is in the middle east, or Germany...But I do think there are a lot of soul mates for individuals, maybe each person has 10, and you have to weed them out. Anyway, I did what I never said I would, I got married. Not in the traditional way, we eloped and if I had to do it over again, I would elope again, with one major change - I wouldn't have told one single person. My mother says we had the worse elopement in history as some people knew, but I'm thinking if I was to do it over, I may announce we got married on our year anniversary, it would have provided me at least one year of being happily married without the pathetic "Disapproval" I have experienced since our elopement! And another reason I never wanted to get married, divorce is pretty expensive!
Kids...Never liked them, thankfully, I have grown a soft spot for Greta Claire, but it has not increased my like for other children, I actually think it has made my dislike for children stronger. They are really, really annoying. I see kids in the stores and just think - why can't your mother afford a babysitter! And these kids are not even being bad, before I just thought that about the screaming and crying kids. But, maybe Darren and I having a kid was destiny, fate, all the things I really don't believe in, as it certainly shouldn't have happened, but here I sit beside a little 8lb baby girl who is cooing at her Winnie the Pooh, no doubt thinking about POO-ING, and it almost seems like it was meant to be...I said ALMOST, don't think I'm getting all sentimental, I've had a few breakdowns this week and why me moments that have lead to conversations of me moving, returning to work, getting a divorce, running away to New Hampshire...BUT, I survived and am calm again (for the time being)! Granted, I really want to go out shopping, but am home alone with her and I guess it's frowned upon to let the Dog babysit her.
So, back to a few SIGNS:
The reason I came up with this topic if you can imagine was me watching You-Tube Video's. Greta loves Beyonce's Single Ladies Video (I'm teaching her young to go for the big Diamond), but as I was sitting down to my breakfast / lunch at 3:30 this afternoon, which consisted of a Twix Bar and a Diet Pepsi, I open up the computer and there it is, a highlighted section of Recommended Videos for YOU to watch, the first one: FAT - by Weird Al Yankovic. I almost threw the computer across the room, I'm feeling a tad pudgy, but come on, even the computer is sending me signs - I did finish the Twix bar, but I guess maybe I should just have Diet Pepsi for lunch from now on!
Summer Sales, it's a sign, the universe has missed me shopping, the credit card companies are going bankrupt and sending out search parties for me, the Confederation Bridge is wondering where in the hell I am - it's a sign that I need to get back in the swing of things and exercise my fingers on the Debit Machines and give the old credit cards a dusting off... If I feel better or not, watch out Moncton, I'm coming next weekend and it's going to be obscene. Then NH, Don't worry, I'm coming back, will be there soon.
So, whatever signs you see, follow them, maybe it's destiny sending you in the right direction. Lord do I ever hope I see a sign out there that says GREECE - I think I may just need to book a vacation.
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