Stat Sheet

In honour of my last prego week (ever), and in recognition of my last obstetrical appointment that I attended at 3:45pm today, I present the pregnancy stat / fact sheet.

266 Days Prego

265 Days of being Freaked out and in denial that I'm pregnant
1 Day of Reality, that there really is a baby coming in 7 days
200 Emotional Breakdowns (I took a few weekends off)
50 times I swore at the Doctors when I found out I was expecting
25 requests for a bed in the psych ward
30 bottles of Vodka I thought of consuming
8 Ultrasounds
2 Bottles of Pre-natal vitamins
1 Bottle of Omega Vitamins
2 Bottles of Calcium
1 Bottle of Valium (joking, it was a generic brand)
50 Dilaudid on stand by
2 bouts of pneumonia
1 case of H1N1
1 hairline fractured rib
3 crohn's related flare ups
1 bladder infection
0 change in chest size
$1500 - approx cost of what I spent in Maternity Clothes, some of which I never really wore because I didn't grow as big as I thought (they are going on sale soon)
1 trip to the IWK
4 trips to the Emergency Room
4 Specialists looking after me
6 Tums "candy" - lucky perhaps!
30 times I’ve Googled "Taking Drugs and Pregnancy"
100 times I've Googled "Baby is not moving, did I hurt her + Is Baby alive"
75 times I've Googled "Death Rates and C Sections"
3 times I've Googled "Divorce and Pregnancy"
1 time I Googled "Baby is moving too much at 38 weeks" - this was tonight!!!
200 times I've explored Medical Sites with my symptoms of the day
266 times I've told Darren I think the baby stopped breathing, well, maybe double this
2 - 3D Ultrasounds (first to find out the sex, second to confirm the sex because I didn't believe them)
85 Motts Freezies consumed - in the past month
40 Boost products consumed - obviously failed this test, as it was suppose to be two a day!
4 months + wait before we told people the prego news due to shock
$6000 (GUESS) spent preparing and buying for baby, this includes clothing!
$6000 (FACT) of what has been spent out in Veterinarian Bills in the past 10 months to ensure Greta will have furry siblings
6 nights I've slept in my own room and not the spare room (Since October)
50 items I bought since Darren announced that we have enough things for the baby
17 lbs gained
266 days that I can still fit in to "some" of my regular clothes - at todays appt, I wore all my OWN regular clothes
266 days that I can still wear my wedding rings
266 days to realize who the true friends are and who really matters and who doesn't
2 - Number of Carats that better be in my present from Darren for having this baby!
1 - The number of babies that better be arriving next week, if there are twins, I'll be eating the valium, drinking the vodka and heading to the psych ward.

So, it's almost over. I reviewed the Dr's schedules for the next 7 days, tomorrow doesn't work for me, I need my hair dyed and it's not an option to miss, but my Dr is on call, so I guess late afternoon would be suitable. Only Day I need to avoid in June 23rd when the Butcher Doctor is on call, all the other Doc's, well, I'm okay with! But, I think little Greta will hopefully wait until her scheduled debut. As I didn't realize today was my last appt until I arrived, I was unprepared with questions, but I (to Darren's embarrassment) did ask how many people he has killed on the operating table and how many babies he has sliced...The Dr said it's bad business to kill patients and he's never had a problem, and cutting babies isn't part of the plan. Darren lowered his head in shame and we left the room!

That is all for tonight folks, thanks for following along in the last few weeks of the journey, the prego blog will be ending next Thursday and the Parenthood one starting. Hoping to write next Thursday night in my drug induced state - I'm sure it will be a good one! 7 more days of being insane with worry and hoping to make it to the finish line.