Wondering...

Another rainy day on PEI, the weather all week has been a tad depressing, besides heading out to lunch way too much this week, I found myself staying in bed or relaxing on the couch as I had no desire whatsoever to head out in the wet weather. Although, a bit of a triumph tonight, thought I'd try on my raincoat and what do you know, still fits with tons of room to spare, so either it was miles too big in the first place, or I have lost weight from my upper body, as it seemed to drape a bit on me...either way, YIPPEE.

The count down is really starting to be noticed, I'm seeing people "out and about" and they are wishing me luck, nice gesture, but I'm realizing they are saying that because they are assuming they won't see me again before the baby arrives...HOLY Sh*T...that is making things a bit more real. I still in my warped head am thinking work just told me to take a month off to relax for all my hard efforts (ha, well, maybe they gave me time to work on my mental health), but I certainly have not yet grasped the fact that I'm officially on Maternity Leave, week one is finished actually, the previous weeks were just vacation and family time. Maternity Leave - ME, Gail Edgett, the girl who doesn't like kids, on f'n Maternity Leave...I just can't accept it! Since I have this time to think and wonder, strange thoughts come in to my head...

Tonight, as Darren and I were waiting for garlic fingers (may be my first craving finally happening as I had them last weekend too), I started talking about me dying and what would he do. I'm not sure if this is a normal thought, or just me because my mind thinks about stuff like that here and there. He just shook his head, I do the typical, "Will you be sad?"... he shakes his head again, I think he may have said sure...but then I say, the baby still has to have my last name. So, he says, he could die too, I then told him, the baby will then just have my name!! HA. Well, it's true, I'd put his picture in the room, but I could re-marry, and lord, what a handle the poor kid would have for a last name - Greta Claire Edgett Gallant NEW GUY's last name ( I almost typed in a last name just out of the blue, yikes, that could have caused some raised eyebrows - for the record, if anything happens to Darren in the next 2 weeks, I had nothing to do with it). It was also confirmed, baby is not to follow his religion if I die, he agreed, and DING, the Garlic Fingers were ready - I think he may have even enjoyed walking in the pouring down rain to escape the conversation. For those reading the blog, if I don't make it through, you have a responsibility to make sure he follows through with this agreement but for the record, I feel more confident that things will be okay, I was just doing the Worse Case Scenario Chat.

So, then I get home and start to think, I wish I was an opossum! Do you know gestation for an opossum is just 12 to 13 days. Not even 2 weeks of being pregnant. Humans have 280 long friggin days, it's just a tad excessive if you ask me, surely this day in age there is a super drug to move things along a bit quicker. Granted, as my last post on lessons learned explained, it could be worse, I could BE an elephant, not just look like one, they have to endure 600-660 days of being prego...I wonder if they worry like us and complain and start to waddle. If I was prego for 660 days, let me tell you, I would be one pissed off lady!

And what is the purpose of the Baby on Board signs - is it just a mothers badge of honour, I have baby hear me roar type symbol! I live on PEI, most drivers on the road are lucky to notice cars, lord knows they don't know how to use a signal light and most barely use brakes, are they really going to notice a Baby on Board sign and slow down or let me pass them as a kind gesture and to show respect of enduring 280 days. I think not!

And the PINK Parking spots - I have yet to use one, I've thought of it a few times when the only parking spot I can find seems to be rows and rows from the front entrance, but I have refrained. I think I feel guilty, or maybe it's still part of the denial as if I am still hiding the fact I'm prego like I did the first 5 months and don't want people to see me pull in to a spot and say, oh my Gail is pregnant...Granted, this is really warped as my stomach protrudes from my frame and with the pulled groin muscle, waddling has replaced the "regular gals walk". So, my goal this week, I'm going to park in a Pink Parking Spot. Does anyone know how long I can use these spots, is there a cut off? I'm thinking when I'm back to skinny Gail I could do some quick Christmas Shopping in Nov / Dec by taking advantage of these spots - but I suppose you need to take the kid with you!!! UMMM, makes you wonder!

So, that is the day in Gail's Brain - I've been prego for approx 254 days, as Greta is booked to arrive a week early via Section, that leaves me with 19 days. I'm skeptical if I will actually last 19 more days, the contractions are increasing and my stomach gets so hard I think it will crack in half if I bend. Sure tell tale sign I think she may arrive early, I gave up an opportunity to go to Halifax this week and decided against a solo trip to Moncton, just in case I went in to labour! For goodness sake, the groceries we bought this evening have expiry dates AFTER June 24th. I am shocked I made it, and I have accepted the fact that I think Greta and I will successfully make it through the delivery and come home together. I can visualize her outfits and holidays, which is always a good sign, her first hair cut (which will no doubt be the first week of her life) and seeing my niece hold her for the first time. I just have a strange psychic ability (don't laugh), I've cancelled vacations because I couldn't visualize safely making it, so I guess, in 19 days I'll be recouping in the hospital, drugged out of my mind, watching Darren sitting in a chair with a little baby and my mother coming in with more gifts......

Enjoy what remains of the weekend, hope it's sunny where you are, or the rain brings rainbows tomorrow if you are in the Maritimes!